Bestfriends Rub Popsicles

Two girls bundled in snowsuits sitting on top of a hill.  One looks at the other and says "I just peed in my pants because I had to go to the bathroom."  "You did?" says the other.  "I have to go to the bathroom too" she continues.  "Well," replies the girl, "You should pee in your snow pants too, because it makes you warm." "Okay," the other girl says.

For a five year old, I had some pretty convincing tactics...don't ya think?  Yes, I was the girl who initially peed in her snow pants.  I can pretty much remember my logic for doing it too.  I was so bundled up (thanks mom) that I was convinced that by the time I made it to a bathroom and undressed...I would have peed in my pants anyways.  So why not just "own the moment" and enjoy the relief.  Convincing my best friend to join me was just an added bonus.

Most everyone had (and probably still has) a 'bestie' (or multiple 'besties').  Someone to share your secrets with, someone you have inside jokes with, and someone who is there for you through it all.  I recently came across an old article in the  New York Times that questioned whether or not parents should allow their children to have a 'best friend'.  I immediately thought..."What kind of psychological doo doo did someone come up with to spark this debate?" It seems that discouraging best friendships amongst children, "... is meant to head off bullying and other extreme consequences of social exclusion."... Lame. While I can understand how bullying is an issue amongst some children, I can hardly believe that 'best friends' are at the heart of the matter.

Some of the best memories from my childhood are those that I share with the lovely blonde gal pictured above...Bernadette.  Bernadette and I spent the majority of our childhood years together.  We played together. We had a million sleepovers together.  We even shared half a heart to a 'best friend necklace' (err many best friend necklaces).  We met each other at the wee age of three years old and (as our mothers put it) became inseparable. We were together so much so, that even our families blended in with one another.   From Cabbage Patch Kid dolls to Barbies to listening to Madonna to wearing Abercrombie and Fitch... we grew older.

There are so many memories that we share from our childhood, and it is still fun to reminisce about the ones we both cherish.  I taught Bernadette how to say, "I want something from you" in Arabic. She threw me on a horse [bare back] to teach me how to ride for the first time. We always played "heart & soul" on her piano together.  We made up countless dance routines...our favorite was to Madonna's Like a Prayer (which we still both remember). When we ate popsicles in the summer time we would rub them together so that we could each taste the other one's flavor. Memories, like these, are a distinct part of my past and I couldn't imagine myself without them. To this very day we share a bond that resembles sisters. Bernadette is even expecting her first child in November! It is wonderful to share life's milestones with such a close friend.

Sure, maybe 'best friends' can lead to kids being clicky. It may even incite kids to gang up on one another...but kids are kids.  As parents, you can only hope that you raise your kids to do right. I am excited for the day where Lyla tells us that she has a "best friend."  That will be much better than the day she tells us she has a "boyfriend."

6 months old and 6 months in

Today my beautiful baby girl is 6 months old.  Like any parent would say...time sure does move quickly.  While Lyla has grown a tremendous amount in these past months, so have I.  I have learned a lot about parenthood and a lot about myself.  It is funny how in the course of a year how much your life can truly change.  So in celebration of her (and my) 6 month marker, I have created a list of the top things I  have learned about becoming a mommy. 

20) Worrying is part of the gig.  I always criticized my mother for worrying too much, and now I know why she did (and still does) it.
19) Getting your hair pulled is no longer kinky.
18) Strangers with dirty hands (and long fingernails) touching your baby is not cool.
17) I have more upper body strength than I have ever had.  No weights needed...lugging a meaty baby in a carrier is better than any set of dumbbells.
16) Buying baby clothes is just like coffee in the morning...I just can't say 'no.'
15)  Thank goodness for digital cameras.  I can only imagine how many countless (and some not so great) prints I would have already.
14) High heels become the forgotten shoe.
13) I am pretty darn good at making up songs on the spot.
12) Showering alone is a rarity. Garrett just wishes it was with him.
11) Sharing favorite songs and books with Lyla are some of my most cherished moments. My favorites books are the Runaway Bunny and The Monster At The End Of This Book.
10) Poop is an extraordinary excrement.  I like it better when it stays inside the diaper.
9) Having family near by is truly a blessing.  It also makes for some great entertainment.
8) Making time for myself.  This doesn't mean I am selfish. I am a mommy, but I am also Caroline. I can't forget that.
7) Making time to do things with my hubby.  Date nights and "alone time" are still in order after having a baby.  Sex isn't just for making babies!
6) Set realistic goals. 20 lbs in 12 weeks...not realistic for a mommy like myself.  Set smaller and more achievable goals so I feel good about accomplishing them. (I am happy to report that I am 5 lbs away from my pre-baby weight). 
5) Watching Garrett with Lyla always makes me smile.
4) The moments where Lyla reaches for me, smiles at me, or laughs with me...make my heart melt.
3) I have learned to laugh with life.  Things are not always going to be easy, but a little laughter really does go a long way.
2) Sacrifice is something I will always be willing to do if it involves my daughter. This also goes hand in hand with: the day I get a new job and go back to work is really going to suck.
1) I truly understand what "a mother's love" means.

I am looking forward to what will be in store for us during the next 6 months.  The small moments in life are what truly make each day a lovely day.   {Cue song, "Lovely Day" by Bill Withers}.

When I grow up I want to be...oh wait is it too late for that?

After having Lyla I made a bold decision to leave my job.  It was one of the hardest descisions I ever had to make.  My biggest fear was the uncertainty of it all....financially (of course) and what this would mean for my career path down the road.  I knew I had to take a chance though.  Mostly because my job was not your average 9-5 and that would mean more time at the office and less time with my daughter.  I couldn't make that kind of sacrifice, and I am so happy that I didn't.  You can never rewind time, and I am thankful for every minute I have with my daughter.  Even if the uncertainty is still a bit scary.

Now I am in the process of figuring out what the hell I want to do with my life. One of the greatest things that not having a job has done for me is I have been really forced to review my career path. For a long time I have had that irking feeling that my college degree was a mistake and have been suffering with the whole "had I known then what I know now..." Alas we can not rewind time. Now that I am on the verge of 30 I constantly go back and forth in mind about tackling a career change. There are so many things to consider: Do I pile additional debt on top of my (ridiculous) existing student loans? Am I too old? Is this the right time?  There are too many things to consider, especially in this economy.  Not to mention that even if I did make a career change, it wouldn't guarantee me a job afterward.  Damn.


I found myself retreating from it all: job searching on the internet and applying for ho hum jobs that I wasn't even excited about.  This caused a showdown between me and my husband.  "What is important to you?" he kept repeating. I had been asking myself that same very question.  When I was in my college years I had always imagined myself as a career woman who would make her way up the corporate ladder.  That image is still burned in my brain.  Was I stuck on this because it was a goal that I never achieved?  Or was this something that I really wanted? Or was I just stuck on the money aspect?  Ahhhhhh. So we sat down and made a list.  A list of all the things that are important to me in life.... and it kept coming down to one key thing: happiness.  I need to do what is going to make me happy. How can an idea that seems so simple be so complicated in so many ways?

There was a quote that I recently came across that I liked, "Remember that happiness is a way of travel — not a destination."  I'm packing my bags (well metaphorically speaking).

Listening to the "Oldies"

It's funny how the term "the oldies" changes as we reach each generation.  I think I was most struck by this when listening to the radio with my kid sis (who is 16) and started to quiz her on various artists playing on the radio. I was appalled when she could not identify Aerosmith and Mighty Mighty Bosstones. I know! Right?? (For those of you that know her...be nice).  Of course, I told this to Garrett who shared that, as a teacher, he would often catch kids wearing Bob Marley t-shirts without really knowing who he actually was.  I mean c'mon that is just pure absurd. What is happening out there?? 

Having a daughter I am realizing how attached I am to the things of my past.  Born in 1982 I grew up with some of the most fantastic cartoons, movies, tv shows, toys, music, and just good ol' neighborhood fun.  Right now I am on a Walt Disney kick.  For those of you with me on age...we grew up with the top Disney movies of all time. My favs....The Little Mermaid (1989)....Aladdin (1992)....The Lion King (1994). 

I have been abusing YouTube, playing some of my favorite songs over and over again for Lyla.  It is funny how I still remember <practically> all the words.  I attribute my stellar memory to the fact that I distinctively remember hitting "rewind" on our VHS after each song, and replaying it until I memorized the whole song.  Yeh...you know you did that too.  I can also think back and remember singing these songs a hundred times over as a kid.  I know that I practically had my own rendition of "Part of Your World" from The Little Mermaid, since I am pretty sure that I belted out this song over 100 times on it's own.  One memory I have is performing this song with my cousin Mich Mich at her house in Buffalo, NY in front of our families (because everything is better with an audience when you are a kid). Ohhh to be a kid.  I must purchase these three movies at some point so that Lyla can cherish them as much as I do.

I am convinced that growing up in the era we did was simply- the best.  We had The Smurfs, The Snorks, Transformers, My Little Ponies, Rainbow Brite, Jem, Fraggle Rock, The Muppets (and The Muppet Babies), G.I. Joe, Heman, Shira, and the classic Sesame Street (to name a few).  I know I have had this conversation with plenty of people before, and each time we always end up with the same idea. We want  all of the classic shows from our childhood on DVD so that our kids can grow up watching them instead of the ones on television today (or at least in addition to).  I have taken a peak at some of the kid shows/cartoons on today and all I can ever think to myself is "it's just not the same." Maybe it's because I am not a kid anymore...but mostly I think it is because things are just over done now.  I know that as time goes by we evolve (and so does technology), but it just doesn't seem right to see a cartoon done in Pixar Animation or to watch animated kids using cell phones.  I guess you can call me "old fashion".... weird.